TMI Warning.. Girl Stuff

A lot of young girls tell funny stories about laughing so hard with their friends that they wet their pants. As you get older however, and especially after multiple pregnancies, these stories become less and less funny and more and more of an inconvenience. I've had several middle aged friends tell me they can't run or exercise much because of bladder issues. This was a BIG issue for me after six babies, and two years ago I did something about it. In 2009 I had TVT surgery- you can google it if you want the details. My doctor was Leslie Rickey at the University of Maryland- I wanted a woman for this! All I will say here is that it was covered by insurance, required an overnight hospital stay and a few days of rest at home, and was TOTALLY WORTH IT. There is no way I could be running the way I am now if I had not had the surgery.

My other big obstacle to running and other activity was my chest size. I'd been big on top all my life, bigger after nursing six babies. I felt embarrassed running in public, and my back hurt a lot. Sometimes just standing up for a long period of time was painful. This June I had breast reduction surgery. I went to the wonderful Dr Brent Birely in Bel air, and I went from a DDDD cup to a small C. I was in the hospital for a few hours and was back to normal activity in a week, although complete healing took longer. This was also covered by insurance. I did, and do, have some ambivalent feelings about the surgery. I'm not a big fan of vanity, and I think people should accept their bodies the way God made them. I also don't want my daughters to be self-conscious if they end up well-endowed. On the positive side, my back pain is gone, and it is very fun to be able to buy medium sized shirts (instead of XL) and cheap bras from target instead of expensive minimizers off the Internet. I always try to dress modestly, so most people can't tell exactly what the difference is, but many people ask me if I've lost weight (sadly, no). You can judge the results in the attached pictures.

How to become a (very slow) marathon runner.Because of my build (short, fat, well endowed), I never ran as a kid or young adult. I HATED running and would go out of my way to avoid it. I have delightful childhood videos of me finishing last in enforced races. But as a teen and into my adult years, I found I did like to exercise, spending a lot of time walking and later taking lots of exercise classes. About four or five years ago I saw a program on TV- something like “celebrity fit club” where an overweight actress said her goal was to run around the block. I wondered if I could run around the block, and I decided to try. The first time I did it, my heart pounded so hard I was sure it could be heard by my neighbors. But I persisted, running a little further each day until I was “running” 30 minutes fairly regularly. Let me add here, I ran VERY slowly. I signed up for my first 5K and ran it in 48 minutes- slower than most people can walk. I ran a number of other 5Ks, usually with walk breaks. I ran some of them with my children, which was great because I could blame my slow pace on them! My fastest 5K time was 36 minutes.
Fast forward to last November, when I saw contestants on the biggest loser running a marathon. They mentioned that only 1% of the people in the world would ever complete a marathon, and that inspired me. If they could do it, so could I! I set a goal to run the Ocean City Half Marathon in April, and then train for a full marathon in the fall.
The training plan I used was one by Jeff Galloway (Google him), who is kind of the spokesman for slow runners everywhere. He advises taking lots of walk breaks and running three times a week. I followed his plan, faithfully logging two short runs a week and increasingly longer runs on weekends. I ran in the snow, in the rain, in freezing tempatures. I was amazed to discover that however far you think you can run, adding a mile or two is no big deal. Soon I was running 6, 7, 9, 10 and eventually 13 miles.
The equipment I used for running was:
Asic Shoes
IPhone for music, an armband to hold my IPhone, and over the ear headphones.
An app called “Run keeper” that tracked my time, distance and speed and coached me through the runs.
A baseball cap from the running store (not sure of the brand)
Cheap running pants/shorts from Target.
(For runs longer than an hour):
A fuel belt for water
Cliff energy gels (I took one every half hour on long runs)
I fiddled around with the walk breaks until I found a formula that worked for me: 3minutes 35 seconds running, 10 seconds sprinting, 1 minute and 15 seconds walking. I would skip the walking on downhills or whenever I was feeling really strong.
On April 30th I lined up at the starting line in Ocean City. I was very worried that I would be slower/fatter/dorkier than everyone else there, but it proved to be a non-issue. I never actually saw the fast runners- they took off at the start and were back at the hotel before I finished. I did however see lots of people like me-middle aged, overweight, dedicated runners. I decided to concentrate on getting ahead of one of them at a time, and I ended up coming in ahead of 63 people. I discovered I didn’t need the walk breaks, and I beat my best practice time by 15 minutes. I did some stretching afterwards, put my feet in the ocean, and felt fantastic. I have a finisher medal hanging off my rearview mirror, and I am moving on to marathon training. I ran the first run of my new schedule the Monday after the half marathon.
I am still fat, by the way. I will probably always be fat. But I am done with letting my shape define me. The thing I have learned from all this is that anything you want to achieve, you can do, as long as you are not embarrassed to be at the back of the pack.